'Plaint of the Playwright

'Plaint of the Playwright

[ Wednesday, May 01, 2002 ]

So over at spacenerd.com, we got into a discussion over how no one had a "good" picture from the 80's.

Taylor Negron actually used to say this about the 70's, but I think it still applies.

So here comes:

Bad 80's Photos.

As I scanned in all of these, I was listening to "Tom Sawyer" by Rush. How perfect is that?

This is one of the gayest haircuts I have ever had.  Just so you know.

This was, in all likelihood, the first time I met Nathan and Jerah, my step-brothers. This is in Colorado, and this'd be around...um...1984, maybe? 1985?

Dig my jacket! This was before I'd discovered the joys of wearing all black.

I don't think this looks like me, either.

This was probably in 1987, maybe 86, when I was in the Youth Enrichment Program at Colorado State University.

YEP was a "college experience" program, where you took college-type classes (like college, but more fun), slept in the dorms, and such. It was kinda neat, actually.

I look like this because I'm pretty sure I was too embarrassed to use the showers in front of the other kids, so I didn't bathe all week.

Hey, it grosses me out, too.

My wife wanted me to put this here, because she says I look like Steve Van Haren in this picture.

I'm a loner, Dottie.  A rebel.

Aw, yeah. Dig me. I'm wearing a Members Only jacket.

And I think it's cool.

Plus, I'm wearing sunglasses in study hall.

Oh, yeah.

(The kid with the "white-man's fro" behind me is going to kick the snot out of me later.)

Braces!  Horrible, horrible braces!!!

Wow. This is in middle school, which would put it around 1985 or 1986.

Although it might be freshman year high school.

Anyway, this is me and my cousin Takeo. I can't get over the serious fro that Tak's got.

To say nothing of my seriously gay outfit.

I'm talkin' fuckin' LEE!

I put this here because I know he comes to the board. This is me and my buddy Lee Potcher, freshman year at Montclair High School. Chris Baker is probably taking the picture, since the skateboard I'm wielding is definately his.

Chris also used to have a thing about people taking his picture.

Oh, as a point of trivia, Montclair High is where they shoot most of the exteriors for the show Ed. If Baker turned the camera a little to the left, you'd see Stuckeyville High.

It's like Abbey Road, but for nerds.

Wow, is this proof that I'm not cool.

Okay, left to right, Takeo, me, and Chris Baker (wearing his trademark turtleneck). My dad must have taken this picture, since I think he was our ride. This has to be 1988 or 89.

Look how big my hair is!

Man, Takeo was really skinny.

Maya's teen angst bullshit has a body count.

Oh god! Unclean! Unclean!

This was a publicity shot for a show I did right after high school (making this 1989 or possibly early 1990) called "Footprints In The Dirt," written and directed by my friend Kevin Truex (under his stage name, Tyler Bartholomew).

Ooh, look at the angst!

Left to right, it's Bridget Meredith (now Bridget Summers, according to Classmates.com), Maya Townsend, and of course, me. I think I look kinda like my friend Casey Grimm in this shot, but there you go.

You know, I know I keep saying this, but there's only so not gay a man can look in one of those white sweatshirts.

I had crushes on both the girls in this photo.

Okay, moving on.

Woo hoo!  Check out the GAMS on Bridget!

Hey, here I kinda look like Tobey Maguire.

So much about this photo embarrasses me, I can't tell you.

Anyway, left to right, it's Bridget again, then Eric Grotenstien, then me. Look at the raw emotion.

By the way, Eric's arm is under his shirt, in a cast--he was having big problems with his shoulder. It liked to dislocate at random on him.

I had crushes on both the girls in this photo.

There is no spoon.

This is me.

This is my high school girlfriend's otter.

Any questions?

My wife looked at this and said "You still have that shirt, don't you?"

Yes. Yes, I do.

"Well, here's one where I think you look just the same."

Yeah, except for the copious amounts of neck-fat I have now.

And I had crushes on all the girls in this photo.

They say the lights are twice as bright...in MOOOOONTCLAIR!

And so we end this with my headshot from 1989.

Hey, at least it's not as bad as some people's 80's pictures...

posted by Rob on 10:00 AM | link



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